The Lady Joyce Kho Ming Zhen
A LeO
BoRn On 4th AuGuSt 1985
Early Childhood Educator
Cant live without my loved ones
A kid at heart
She is worth: PRICELESS

♥Loves & N Hates Loves:
♥Purple*AuTuMn*Wiccan*
♥Magic*Glitters&Blings*
♥Stars*Astronomy*Astrology*
♥Snowflake*Maple Leaf*
♥White Lilies*lavender*
♥baby breaths (the flower)*
♥fairytales/princess*crowns*
♥rings*earrings*
♥peppermint green tea*
♥Salmon sakshimis*cream pastas*
♥surprises*romance*
♥hugs*smilez*fun*
♥sprinkles*crystals*girl power*
♥goth*vampires*
♥read*eat*sleep*
♥movies*psp games*iPhone*
♥Pirates of the Caribbean*
♥Edward Scissorhands*
♥Transformers*X-Men*
♥LOTR*Harry Potter*
JOHNNY DEPP
♥Angelina Jolie*
♥Kristen Kreuk*
♥Michael Jackson*
♥Britney Spears*
♥Nicole Scherzinger*
♥Formula One races*Ferrari*
♥quotes*stories*
♥Boots*Bags*Baby-G watches*
♥Perfumes:*CK Eternity
moment*Clinique Happy
Heart*Elizabeth Arden Pretty*
♥Galaxies*Universe*
♥Winter*tattoos*hennas*
♥Beach*Ocean*

Hates:
N Hypocrites*Backstabbers*
N*two-headed snakes*Snobs*
NPpl who thinks they are gd-looking and so they are superior*
NPpl who act cute*
N Gossipers*Busybodies*
NWhiners/Annoyers*Irritants*
N betrayers*two timers*
N bootlickers*paedophiles*
Ndisappointments*
NRapists*Molesters*
NHer temper*Her emo*
NHer insecurities*

Her Pals
♥Hui
♥Yu Pei
♥MeL
♥SaRah
♥LiNa
♥FiOn

Her Speech

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Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Trust and self protection

[ Learning to protect myself ]

Everyone says I must learn how to protect myself.

When you want to help other people, they say, don't just stupidly show your true self, and introduce everyone in your world to the person you want to help. Like your boyfriend, your best friend, friends etc.

Cos you can never count on whether this person appreciates it. Meaning he or she might just start to dislike what you do or say and prefers your other friends' company. Cos you never know what this person will say to your friends about you, or that he or she can be trusted to be a friend enough for you to reflect on themselves rather than just pinpointing your mistakes.

And the best part is sometimes the person you helped might be so blinded that they didn't know they are also making the mistakes that they pinpoint you of. It's betrayal to the ultimate sense from the back.

That's what true friends do. Even if my friends don't tell me about my mistakes, but when they all start to ignore me, I will reflect on it. Rather than blaming and questioning them and thinking I have no fault cos they don't tell me. Cos that's what true friends are for. I know if Suqi (or any of my close friends) ever do that, I will reflect on myself even if she doesn't want to talk about it.

But that's the problem about me. I just trust people easily and as long as you want me as a friend, I will be your friend and tell and share with you everything about me, like my problems, my past etc, even if I know you only for awhile.

But I have learnt that it can be used against you. You can be seen as self-centered rather than seen as sharing cos not everyone appreciates sharing. I always thought that as long as you share and give a part of yourself to your friend, they will appreciate it.

Apparently not, as there are all kinds of people in this world. What I thought of giving part of myself may seem different to others.

It's the same about helping people. Everyone else that are smart told me that they will never help someone by introducing their own close friends to the person they want to help. Looks like I am the only stupid one.

Nvm. I learnt my lesson. Enough about that.

I was feeling really down for the past few weeks. I am grateful for my brother. I would have felt so alone without him.

Yes, I know. I said it before. But that's the thing. I never ask or intrude his time when I was down. I mean, I will feel damn paiseh and pathetic if I keep taking up his time, by keep hanging around with him and his friends etc.just cos' I'm down and need company. Especially now that he has a girl friend.

Yet he took the initiative to keep me company. Though he did not introduce me to all his friends(which guy will? No guy I know did that) just so I have some company, he just kept asking me out, just the two of us. (actually I will be super paiseh if I keep hanging out with my younger brother's friends cos' I will feel like I really have no life, so I am really glad I did not do it just so I have his company) I even ask him to go out with his girl friend or his buddies, no need to keep me company , but he is really sweet cos' he insisted on keeping me company.

And even when he reassured me that he rather keep me company than hang out with his girlfriend and friends, I still feel bad so I kept apologizing.

My brother really has grown up hasn't he? To rather spend time with his ol' sis just cos' she is down, than his pretty girlfriend.

I still feel bad cos he has his own life and need own space with his life without his sister tagging along all the time:(

I shall do something for him, I am not that thick skinned ok:x
Joyce Kho Ming Zhen ♥ 2:53 AM link to post 0 comments